Remember those days of getting all dolled up to go out with your girlfriends or with a group of friends to celebrate a birthday or just a fun night out? Remember those nights of wearing heels so high that you towered over even the tallest of bouncers around? Remembers those nights of going out without a worry in the world other than making sure you had a safe ride and wouldn't have a headache the next day?
Well, welcome to motherhood.
That shit has all changed.
Okay, okay so not completely.
Or I suppose it's more appropriate to say that for some that has changed a lot; for some it hasn't changed much and for some of us, it is just on pause. Prior to having a baby, I wasn't one to go out every weekend, but together with my friends and our husbands we had our fair share of fun nights. Fast forward to present day, and this mama had her first night out dancing with her best girl friends in over two years (something I LOVE and had been dying to do).
I should probably put out a disclaimer that I am
girl who is always in the front by the band dancing my booty off (hey, I'm a dancer, I can't
move to music). I'm the girl who'll go up and dance with the guys trying to break dance and I'm the girl who'll moonwalk across the floor to a good MJ song (
And this is all without alcohol.
But this time?
This time as a mother there were some differences.
Prior to motherhood, we don't have to check our phone every ten seconds while out with friends. But when daddy is home with a sleeping baby who wakes frequently and expects mama to be there, mama will check her phone every ten seconds (okay so really every five minutes). We may even escape our night early out of fear that our child is crying for us and daddy (or grandma) isn't telling us so we can enjoy ourselves.
That thought gives me shivers.
Now let's talk about the ensemble.
For this mama personally, heels lately are a thing of the past. Flat shoes are just so much more comfortable and considering it has been awhile since I really walked around in heels, there's a good chance I might would have busted my ass. So for a mama who hasn't practiced much in heels lately, flats it was.
They may not be as showstopper stunning, but I can dance better in flats anyway. Pair them with some comfortable clothes that don't reveal stretch marks and milk bags, and you're good to go.
And how about that time I went to the bar in a nursing bra? Yep, that would be me this weekend. Considering that I hardly wear nursing bras anymore, I found it humorous and ironic that I had one on at the bar. I mean,
not like anyone is going to be seeing my bra
, but the idea that I'm shaking my groove thing to "Baby Got Back" in a nursing bra is just somewhat funny to me.
Oh and we can't forget that time I had to leave the bar after being in there for only ten minutes because my little nursling woke up screaming and looking for me. Thank goodness for living close enough to run home and tend to baby before heading back out with my friends. Yea, that totally happened this weekend.
I almost didn't go back out.
And finally, how about that time that a young guy barely old enough to drink asked me to dance, only to hear me say
"I have a husband and a baby"
(after his question of "why you have a boyfriend or something?").
Yea I have something alright.
Let's just say my answer may have startled him into an
followed by a quick exit which preceded my non stop laughter.
Bet he didn't see that coming.
So what did I learn about going out now as a mama? Well, I learned that my booty is still capable of twerking but it may wiggle just a little bit more. I learned that I can dance in a nursing bra and flats and still feel like a "woman" despite the gorgeous blonde next to me with heels and a stunning figure. And I learned that while being a mother brings out new worries and concerns, that we women should and can, still live our life. Going out doesn't have to mean going to a bar, but even just a night out to dinner and a movie with a group of your best girlfriends sans baby. Or even just a day of shopping in the city without the kiddos on occasion. We can and should occasionally allow ourselves to have these moments
(but hey, some of us don't need that and that's okay too)
I don't need to have to those moments, but it's nice to get some time away and remember the woman I was before I became a mother.
However, I like the woman I am now much more than the woman before I was a mother. Life has so much more depth, meaning and love now. I first and foremost, am a mother.
So with that being said, motherhood does completely change your life (but for the better). It's our job now to take care of someone else who completely depends on us and it's our job to make sacrifices for our families. There's no place on earth I'd rather be than with my child and my husband.; that's more fun than any night out.
Heck, I haven't even let my 14 month old sleep away from home yet.
But if the time comes to have some fun and unwind, just know that you
do it all in a nursing bra.
Our only photo from the night (I'm in the fedora) and these are my besties!
Do you still enjoy a fun night out with friends every
now and then since becoming a mother?
Thanks for reading, Sasha