Sometimes I Suck as Mother

 Photo by Gray Photography, Copyright to The Mushy Mommy

Photo by Gray Photography, Copyright to The Mushy Mommy

That’s right.

I occasionally suck as a mother. There, I said it. I’m not proud of it. I am not ashamed of it. I am just a mom, standing in a toy filled room (probably standing on a lego) and I’m telling you that on occasions I suck as a mother.

I’m pretty sure I thought I’d always be some calm and collected mother, knitting sweaters and baking apple pies. And while I bake a lot of cookies and Amazon Prime a lot of clothes, I am not always who I thought I’d be. For starters, I know nothing about knitting and I don’t even care for Apple Pie (chocolate please).

I’m pretty sure that I thought I’d yell a lot less, never discipline and never want to ram my head into a wall. But when you’re standing there face to face with the most stubborn three year old on this side of Mars, you kinda wanna ram your head straight into the wall.

I never quite imagined that I’d always be searching for my keys each morning, hanging onto a solid 10% battery life pretty frequently and pushing that E sign in my car. But the truth is, mom life is a little messy and a whole lotta crazy, so sometimes I just live life on the edge.

There are mornings where the rush to school drop off is like a manic episode of who is gonna wear what, why haven’t you put your shoes on yet and why do you eat breakfast as slow as a snail. Or a sloth. Or a turtle. Or I don’t know, but whatever the slowest creature is…that’s it. WHY?

Why is it that so much can go so wrong some days? Why is it that what I envision for myself, my family and my children can be displayed so differently? Was I setting the bar too high? Expecting too much today? I’m pretty sure pre-mom me didn’t envision dropping her kid off to school after a heated debate about a skirt uniform vs a dress uniform. Pre-mom me probably thought I’d be dishing out bagels and kale smoothies on the way out the door; instead some days I’m dishing out crazy mama. And let’s face it, that’s no way to start the day.

Life as a mother to littles, is messy and crazy. It’s surely nothing like what you probably envisioned about yourself prior to. You’ll learn a lot about yourself, your limits and boundaries and especially your grace and patience. You’ll learn that you need Jesus and you’ll also learn that you need strong Coffee and a Target nearby.

You’ll learn as a mother that you sometimes suck and that it’s okay because no one does this gig perfectly anyway. No one, no matter how gentle and patient they are can navigate the trenches of motherhood effortlessly and perfectly. It’s just not real.

It’s so easy to get caught up in our failures, our hard days and the moments where we know we failed. It’s so easy to beat ourselves up over the moments where we know we just plain ole’ sucked as a mother. It’s easy to think that someone somewhere else is doing a much better job than you. Instagram Susie probably doesn’t yell and blogger Nancy probably had kale for breakfast.

But the thing is, is that we all suck some days. We all have crappy mornings, off days and messy lives. We can’t all knit sweaters and many of us prefer to go with store bought pies most days. Motherhood isn’t about being perfect but about learning how to make beauty out of the imperfections. It’s about showing unconditional love through the darkness and finding grace in the trenches. It’s about forgiving and praying for forgiveness. It’s about realizing your weaknesses and flaws and working on fixing them so life goes smoother. It’s about organizing shish a little better and making things run smoothly for the little people depending on you. It’s a giant hat, but someone has to wear it.

It’s learning, loving and yes, occasionally sucking at your role as mom. But sshhhhh, let me tell you a secret…you’re the ONLY one who thinks you suck. In that moment, in that day and that messy, crazy life…you’re still “mommy.” And believe me, to those little ones mommy never sucks. She’s just occasionally a loud, kinda crazy and maybe slightly irrational but totally cool, incredibly beautiful and oh so loving mommy. We are everything to these little people, whether we suck or not.

Besides, I’d take all the sucky days over and over again just to be their mama. Wouldn’t you?? So go off and have a great day, or a sucky one. It really doesn’t matter I suppose because at the end of the day, we’re all just hanging on by a thread, tired as crap and loved more than we ever dreamed imaginable. It’s a totally beautiful, messy and sometimes sucky life. And it’s totally okay by me.


Sasha Savoy

Sasha is the owner and founder of The Mushy Mommy, a natural mother and baby boutique and The Mushy Mommy Village. She is a SAHM who works hard at living as minimal and unprocessed as possible, but never claims perfection. Her mission is to inspire, encourage, enlighten and empower mothers all over to feel good about their choices, to make healthy choices and to enjoy motherhood and all of its beauty and chaos. 

Our Hello Bible Box

I love subscription boxes and have always wanted to sign my children up for a monthly craft box, but in the end I could never justify it. It was always too expensive or just not the right time. But when I came across Hello Bible Box, I had to just go for it!

This Christian based subscription box is genius my friends, and not expensive at all. What I loved with this was that I could personalize it for two children which allowed us to have two of each craft, so each kid could do their own thing.

Everything in this box was above and beyond what I had expected. There’s a card FULL of scriptures that goes along with the lesson of the box (this month was of course Christmas) and there was a beautiful story on the birth of Jesus Christ.

We followed up the story with two different crafts that were artistic as well as great for developmental and fine motor skills for my toddler. There’s a card within the box that walks you through doing this box properly with your children and even offers you engaging questions to ask your kids while doing your activities and learning about our Savior.

The final touch that I loved with this box is that Danny the Donkey is our “guide” and helps us with discovering our box. My five year old loved him and quickly stored away his name to hold onto for our future boxes. We received a card that each month we will place a sticker on to remind us of our hard work learning new scriptures and lessons. While we completed the whole box in one evening, I plan to work on some of the scriptures and reread the beautiful book throughout the next couple of weeks. My five year old even had a beautiful idea of saving our new ornaments for Christmas Eve since, “It’ll soon be Jesus’ birthday!”

I look so forward to getting one of these in each month and for sharing scriptures and the life of Jesus with my children. While my three year old was still not able to understand a lot of what was being discussed, my five year old was all IN this! This truly is a great way to bring more faith based projects and lessons into the home and to have more discussions about Jesus Christ. It makes things fun and less school like. We want to make learning about Jesus exciting - so give them some paint and crafts and it becomes very exciting!

So thankful we gave this a try!

If you’d like to learn more, make sure to visit the link here.

“When they saw the star, they were overjoyed.”

Matthew 2:10

Hello Bible box

Essential Oils are for Everyone and Every Lifestyle

 These are all of the oils available for aches, pains and sore muscles. We help you learn how to safely apply them and which ones to try. A few of these actually come in the starter kit.

These are all of the oils available for aches, pains and sore muscles. We help you learn how to safely apply them and which ones to try. A few of these actually come in the starter kit.

I think sometimes one of the biggest things that people fear about making healthy switches for their lifestyle is that they simply aren’t “natural” enough to make any changes. People fear that because they’re not some tree hugging hippie with a pocket full of oils and a satchel of lavender with them, that they can’t begin a healthier lifestyle.

Dude, that is so wrong.

I’m here to tell you friends that beginning a journey with essential oils and/or non toxic products isn’t about being the biggest hippie or some natural guru. It’s not about knowing and doing all the things. It’s not about some perfect, kale eating lifestyle. It’s just simply not all of those things.

 In our home we use all natural and plant based products. You don’t have to be like this to use oils, anyone can use oils.

In our home we use all natural and plant based products. You don’t have to be like this to use oils, anyone can use oils.

Many people that I know have used essential oils for either a portal to a more natural lifestyle or simply just because they were intrigued by them and wanted to give them a shot. For some people, they get a starter kit of oils and begin using the heck out of them and slowly start switching their hygiene and cleaning products to more natural options. For others, they don’t really have much interest in doing those things, but they love the aromas of the oils in their home.

With a new year approaching, I encourage you to consider what sort of healthy, smaller change you can make for your home. Not just yourself and your personal goals, but a healthy change for your family as well. You see, something as simple as getting rid of plug ins and candles and replacing it with 100% pure essential oils can actually help children out drastically. You’ll likely notice a difference if anyone in your home typically suffered with asthma or allergies. You’ll decrease their toxic chemical exposure drastically because candles and plug ins are the biggest and most toxic air pollutants in the home.

Using oils to purify and freshen up your home naturally is the first step to a wonderful and healthy new year. Even if it’s the only step you make with your oils, it’s a dang good step.

Fear of the unknown can definitely be tricky. People look at essential oils and hear videos and read posts and still assume that these foreign bottles will always be just that…foreign. But as I’ve seen over and over again, the ones who jump in and ask ALL the questions, are the ones who quickly gain confidence with their oils AND who uses them well beyond just diffusing them. They are the ones who quickly begin helping others in our private groups. How amazing?!

 Many people find success with this oil and the help it can provide toddlers, babies and little ones with sleeping better through the night.

Many people find success with this oil and the help it can provide toddlers, babies and little ones with sleeping better through the night.

An organic and all natural lifestyle sometimes just isn’t for everyone. But essential oils - they can totally be for everyone. Everyone loves things that smell great; everyone loves something to ease muscles and aches; everyone loves good sleep and happy emotions. And everyone WANTS to be healthy and not constantly on that sick train.

So friends, I hope you give these gems a try one day. Today may not be your day, and that is okay. But one day when you’re tired of the constant sick days, tired of the allergies or just wanting to cover up that pet smell, you’ll be ready. And you can jump right in and we’ll help you discover all that these beautiful bottles can offer for you and your family.

And maybe, just maybe…you’ll discover a whole new lifestyle of health and wellness. Heck, you may even hug a tree one day to thank it for all that it has done for you.