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Frequently when scrolling through your ever growing news feeds, you come across those photos that may make you second guess yourself as a mother.
You know which photos I'm talking about
-- the photos of the mother breastfeeding her one year old (when you only made it one week) and the photos of all the homemade baby food (when your pantry is stocked with Gerber). There are photos of a yummy organic dinner in your news feed that you just so happen to be checking out while stuffing your face with a yummy, processed Hot Pocket. There's photos in your feed of stay at home kids doing homeschooling activities while yours are quite comfortable on the sofa watching Dora the Explorer for the fifth time today.
Hey, at least they are learning another language right?
So what's the line between being proud and claiming perfection?
Personally as a mother who does show images of yummy homemade baby food prepared by me or who does show a yummy organic meal, there's nothing wrong with sharing. Quite honestly I don't think that by sharing I'm claiming perfection. In fact, if you check my feeds you'll see that I likely cooked an organic meal on Monday night while we ate pizza takeout on Friday night. And somewhere in between there I likely noshed down on a big bowl of ice cream. That's far from perfection my friends. That's just me really sharing what we do, what we like and how we live. Yes, my name is Sasha and I buy primarily all organic groceries but I don't turn down chocolate.
But should we as mothers be proud of the things we do?
Heck yes we should.
As hard working mothers we should be proud of our hard work and we should embrace our imperfections. Being proud doesn't mean that you're claiming perfection. Being proud is just saying,
"Hey look what I did today, that I don't do every day."
Should we not be proud of how long we breastfed for just because others may think we're claiming that we did it better?
We should be proud because whether it was for six weeks, six months or one year, breastfeeding is hard work and every little bit is something to be proud of. Why can't we share the stash of baby food we made today -- that took a lot of time and effort?! We had no clue we could successfully do it once we started and then boom, we realized how easy and fun it was. Why not show others our creation that we are proud of and who knows, maybe it'll inspire someone else to do the same!
The mommy wars have made such an impact on our posts and the thought process that we put into our social network posts these days. We don't want to word something as to offend someone and we definitely don't want to act like we're claiming perfection. Sure we can all admit there's a few that may think they are indeed doing it all perfectly, but quite honestly I love embracing my imperfections as a mother. Those imperfections allow for yummy chocolate goodness, a few too many reruns of Frozen and an abundance of cuddles in pajamas.
We don't need to censor ourselves as mothers just because of the mommy wars. Being proud, sharing our tidbits and showing what we're up to doesn't mean that we're claiming perfection or that we think we're doing it better than you. Chances are the same mother who posted a yummy organic meal photo today will scroll through her feed tomorrow and envy the other mother who looks like she just has her shit together.
That's what motherhood does to us sometimes. We envy some, we cringe at some, find inspiration from some and we relate to some. Break down the judgment and walls that make you think someone is claiming perfection when in actuality; they are just sharing a glimpse into their life. Break down the walls that make YOU feel inferior just because your dinner isn't organic, your baby eats Gerber and your four year old knows every line to Frozen.
Sometimes as mothers we all need to get out of our own heads to realize that every mama has a different way of doing things and no one is really perfect. Embrace your imperfections and find your inspirations and BE PROUD of what you do.
Rock on mama.
How many of you feel like you have a right to be proud of the way you live, parent and who you are in general?
I myself find so much inspiration from other mothers who share their ways and their lifestyle.
So thank you.